Wednesday, 26 August 2009

Agony Aunt Request

Guide to Being a Scottish Bride had the following request sent through by email by a very lovely lass in Dunfermline.

"I was wondering if Guide to Being a Scottish Bride had a sorta ‘agony aunt’ feature? And if it does I wanted to put forward my problem for some help and advice.
Recently I’ve been feeling less excited about our wedding, things don’t seem fun anymore and all we seem to talk about is weddings. I’m getting scared that once the wedding has passed we’re going to have nothing to talk about and worse still it feels like family are only interested in anything we have to say because the wedding is an excuse to party!

Can you suggest anything to help?

Andrea, Dunfermline"

Firstly I would like to say thanks for getting in touch Andrea. We had not previously thought about having an "agony aunt" feature on GTBSB, but it's a fantastic idea! Thanks for that.

More importantly, on to your dilemma and seeing if we can come up with a "cure". You've not said how long it is until your wedding, but for the sake of conversation we will assume it's soon. Personally I think it's best to take time away from wedding planning, we tend to take atleast 1 night a week off from weddings (all wedding talk is banned - it incurs a fine of £5 if the "w" word is menioned!) but we also try to have a date night once a month to remind us what makes our relationship special and to have dedicated "us" time.

I think it's important to remember why you're getting married, and to ignore the people around you that are providing no help at all. Are there specific people in your families that are causing you heartache? Would it be possible to say to them how you feel?

As for after the wedding, you will have so much to talk about. You have all the photos, a video if you're having one, you can think about your first anniversary and of course remember why you got married - because you want to spend the rest of your life with the person that you love. Often the date night idea can be a great feature to carry through into your married life.

I hope that helps you Andrea, and please stay in touch. We're a real nosy bunch here at GTBSB and would love to hear from you again!!

Take care

1 comment:

  1. Kate - Loving this feature!!

    Andrea it's perfectly normal, we've all been there. We eat, breathe and dream weddings when we are planning them and yes our lives do get taken over. Kate's right, you do have to have a day where you step back and do other things, talk about other things. My husband and I used to go out on the bicycles and find a random spot just to sit and be together, we didn't necessarily have to talk, just be together :)! It was lovely and just the escape we needed.

    Why not put all your wedding stuff away for a weekend? Spare room/loft..then you won't be tempted to 'sort that one last wee thing'!

    Hope you're feeling better x